Back in Spokane again. Heidi and Buck are doing their agility thing, first trial in a year... and I'm supposed to be editing on A Pair of Second Chances, the next e-book I'll soon be publishing.
But, a couple of conversations Mark and I had, sitting by the Harbor in Anacortes keep echoing in my head... and being as how large and empty a space that is, ya'll can imagine how irritating all that noise can be!
We both agreed that you have to be careful, when you publish your "opinions". People are listening! Some are even out there making decisions based on what we might say...
But at the same time, we've got to keep it honest, and stay true to our own beliefs.
While trying to keep a good attitude, We try not to buffalo folks with unadulterated Bull Produced, Natural fertilizer; painting some fanciful western story, that it always leads to sweetness and light... Where the good guy always wins... and the end of the story is he rides off into the sunset...
Sometimes, he gets ambushed, shot in the back... Sometimes, you crash and burn. Sometimes you make the best choice you can at the time... and Still end up getting towed into the dealership, a hundred miles away... wondering how you're gonna pay the bill.
A person has to take responsibility for their own actions...
It's thoughts about all that, after our year and more on the road, under less than Flush, circumstances, that have been rattling around, keeping my cogitator from gathering rust... a whole lot of wear marks, but little rust!
What are your expectations as YOU pursue YOUR dreams?
The most risky of 'em all, is the false expectation that this journey is going to be one of dancing, giggling, ecstasy... every day.
Thinking that once you crack out and get on the road, you're eyes are gonna pop open each morning, and the sound of your own giggling is gonna wake up the neighbors... is the wrong and risky way to go, from where I sit.
It's risky 'cause if that don't happen, and it won't, you might just get discouraged and say; "Damn!", surrender, and go back to the same old mind numbing, drudgery you worked so hard to escape.
Look, the first few days might be some great excitement, and there will be one or two along the way... but otherwise... it's still just living. But, hopefully, living in way that Fits a little better, and is juuuuuuust a bit more fulfilling.
I know; "What's the alternative?" you ask? If it ISN'T a day in day out giggling joy... What is the reality? Is there an Alternative Expectation?
Well, from where I sit, there is one... and I think it's a more sustainable sort of deal...
How about; You climb out of bed sayin'; "Damn! It's cold!" and rustle over to kick the thermostat up a couple notches. You're tired, you didn't sleep well last night, worryin' about a tire on the trailer that seems to be wearing funny along with a misbehaving water heater and wonderin' how you're gonna fit all that into the budget, 'cause you know the registration on the fiver is due next month.
Your e-books and websites, that are payin' 'bout half your 'way' aren't flying off the electronic shelf or burning up the internet, making you rich like they are in your fantasy scenario... but... they are moving; providing, a quiet, fulfilling feeling just in that... so deep inside, you know you can shuffle things here and there...
You still have room in the budget to shave a thing or too should shove come to kick... You know you can keep on putting one foot in front of the other... You've gained a year and more of confidence.
So, kinda bleary eyed you set about making your morning coffee. While it's perkin' you drag your duds into the bathroom and get dressed... When you come out, you impatiently pour a cup of coffee out of the half perked pot... and step outside onto the steps of the rig to take in the early morning...
And that's when it strikes you...
Standing there in front of the rig, Your head tilts back and your eyes close in the crisp morning air. You pull in a lung full of fresh, pine scented air and after holding it for some seconds, you slowly let it slide out of your chest, while a faint smile creases your face.
The Feeling I'm trying to describe is not so much something you actually feel... but maybe... something you don't.
Pressure. That tightness that constricts your heart... and formed a knot in your gut for too many years... is gone. Yes the little aggravations of life remain... but now, that's all they are... little chores. Small things to be dealt with and forgotten.
Otherwise, You've no where you have to be, and all week to get there. Your time is your own, to do with as you please.
There are no Bosses telling you move this! Tote that! Go here! Get to Work!
For maybe the first time in your life, YOU own THIS DAY. You OWN... YOUR LIFE... and you know, that if you keep on standing with the courage to confront the "System" from which you tore your Freedom... That if you Keep on Keeping On... That Freedom you now enjoy, will continue.
You are now, just a Man... or ... a Woman... Free on the Earth. That, is a feeling I don't know how to describe. Maybe it's different for everyone. I know, for sure and for certain, it's something you have GOT to know.
Don't let that get lost in one of the other big mistakes I think people can make getting to, or staying on, this Freedom Road...
Too many people, and myself still included... spend too much time, worrying about the how of things. The HOW of ropin' their dreams... Whether that be RV Boondocking, or something other.
What kind of rig, how much should I spend, what brand, what size, how to pay, how to protect... how, how, how... and all that worrying, about things... ends up eatin' up the dream, so that when they finally do get loose... they've lost sight of why they're there in the first place...
And that... The WHY... The FREEDOM, is the real thing they should have been concentrating on. Keep that up front. Keep that... The WHY, consciously, in your Vision... and all the rest will fall into place.
Keep the Vision in your Eyes... and that part of your brain, that the scientists haven't figured out what it does yet, will be working out those details about the how of Things, behind your eyes...
Your job is to keep the fuel for that filled up... Satisfying the Hunger for knowing The WHY!
Ruminations on the Road
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